jocelyn vye

*This world has been cruel to me. I will have my vengeance.*

For those who refuse to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks…but the process will be so much swifter.

For those who don’t use turn signals…thanks for keeping me alert.

For those who leave one sheet on the toilet paper roll…I do need more spontaneous opportunities to problem solve.

For those who leave the K Pod in the coffee maker…smart. We don’t want a soggy trash can liner.

For the vegetarian who’s all up in your face about it…what a luxury to have the means to make this your identity.

For meat lovers who hate vegetarians…wait, so there’s more meat for you?

For those who refuse to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks…oh, I just thought it would be cool to be multilingual, my bad.

For those who marginalize…that’s true…oh, wait you mean me? Oh sweetie, I’m far too clever to tacitly acquiesce.

For marginalized people…that’s true…but who decided that for you?

For those who park in the last spot up front…I don’t even look at my step count before I close my eyes, champ, that shit’s assumed.

For those who use pejoratives in a fun defiant way…I hear you, and I know you’re hurting. You matter, too.

For kids without present parents…you are acquiring so many useful skills, keep going. Disney’s more fun when you’re the one paying for the dining plan.

For those who refuse to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks…there’s a Dunkin’ ten feet that way, and it’s cheaper, and it’s better, probably.

For the kids without present parents, just in case…you are 100% star stuff, little one. I see your shine.

For those who politicize Thanksgiving…I get it, but the stuffing doesn’t know what year it is.

For those who seek to proselytize…I’m so happy you’ve found faith, it’s so important.

For those on the far right…yes, but did you see a hawk today?

For those on the far left…yes, but the hawk?

For those who refuse to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks…I’d kill for a hill that small to die upon.

For those with the loudest voice…so sorry, I was just noticing Val’s new haircut.

For those on that anti rhetoric…that’s true, but have you had your gallon of water today?

For those on that anti anti rhetoric…yeah, it’s tough, but like Shakira is still making music, you know?

For those with inflexible core principles…be right back, I need a stretch.

For those who bully…I see you, kid. You’ll get through this.

For those who refuse to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks…say Ariana instead, it’ll make her day. Just kidding that’s lame. Just kidding, do it.

For those being bullied…I see you, kid. Goddamn you’re so powerful.

For those who didn’t cry last year…those tears are cortisol bombs. Drop ’em.

For those without strength…yes, but you read this.

For those without a voice…who said so?

For those who are too much…if the space is empty, right?

For those who refuse to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks…honestly I can’t figure out how to reset the WiFi anyway. My place?

For those who can’t go on…yes, but you read this.

For those who make my space uncomfortable…fine, I guess I’ll learn something here.

For those I haven’t met yet…I’m assuming the best of you.

For those I’ve met who haven’t been their best…I’ve only seen that version of you, who are you now?

For those I’ve met who haven’t been their best and still suck…you’re bringing joy to someone’s life who needs it from you.

For me…I really need to learn the cup sizes at Starbucks.

For those who have wronged me…how boring to have nothing to set right.

For one, for all…have you danced today?